I hate you. yes you. *stares at the mirror*
I recognize me in you
If you were a secure confident person you wouldn’t have to seek my social media page to make yourself feel better. I know this because I used to be that girl who instead of demanding answers you rather do “your research” cause your verbal communication skills suck. I just feel bad for you cause I know the problems you can encounter by seeking things out. U may see things you don’t wanna see and it will make you realize that what you thought was real isn’t real at all. I was so convinced that you weren’t about drama but a drama seeker goes on my page and assumes I’m talking about her. From here on out I will address you in my blog so your mind doesn’t have to wander. In the back of my mind I thought you could have cared about me as a woman and what I’ve been through and just wanted to be a kind stranger telling me it’s gonna be ok. Now I know you are just nosey as fuck because your needs aren’t getting met. You wanna know if what you are doing is the right thing and you wanna know if I really moved on so you don’t feel guilty. Don’t feel guilty, u didn’t do anything wrong accept ask yourself what’s really bothering you. Does looking at my shit really satisfy you. I bet you a million dollars you still don’t have the answer to your questions. When you’ve gone through something it’s easy to recognize the same situation in someone else. You’ve been hurt before. You and your ex broke up maybe let me guess….earlier this year. This new guy is great he makes you feel special but you are trying to protect yourself so you don’t get hurt again. But in reality you are looking at your new boyfriend ex girlfriends Tumblr page. How sad is that? Maybe even more sad than me still crying over him? I could tell you the truth but you will eventually find out on your own. And I pray for you everyday that the pain won’t break you as much as it did me. Anywho I feel like ever since you accused me of taking about you I just wanted to give you the shine you were begging for. Now I can go back to my life with my buu, my job and people who I know have my best intentions.
I hope you love your next baby more than you loved our baby. I hope you love them enough to protect them and want to be apart of their lives. I hope you don’t abandon and leave their mother how you left me. Just because I got sad cause of what happened didn’t mean that I didn’t need you. I needed you to protect me, to pay attention to me, to love me until I loved myself again. But you lacked patience and decided it was time for you to leave and fine someone else with less baggage. I wish you loved Elijah enough that you would want to work stuff out with his mother……me. But sometimes I feel like you are trying to erase that last 3 yrs out of your mind. I can’t ever forget you. You gave me my son. How can I hate you. I just wish you did more to show me you cared.